Aquaman and Puppies

...have not gotten a fair shake in the internet forum world, in popular forms of media, and on the street. Aquaman gets disrespected constantly. Robot Chicken and Family Guy-in recent episodes, this cartoon here, Chris Rock-and the general feeling I gather from casual observers that the ability to talk to the creatures of the sea is a little appreciated power. St. Francis of Assisi could talk to the animals, the Beastmaster could talk to the animals, why does Aquaman get the shaft? Many such cartoons, and other malcontents make some singularly "clever" remarks about Marine Biology departments, like such skills would only be useful in the hallowed and narrowly defined halls of academia. Does anyone tell Wonderwoman she would be great in a Women's Studies department? Or Batman should seek a full-time position in Chiroptera Research facility? Aquaman is not an animal he is a man an Aqua-man!

Second, violence against Puppies is always used as an example of intolerable cruelty or gross levels of injustice. Especially when they are kicked or eaten, and most disturbingly when they are already dead. Leave the puppies alone. They have done nothing. Their only crimes are being eminently cute and uniquely vulnerable. I am convinced there is some strange obsession with puppies under duress for college age males. Those who have taken a Psychology 101 course in school might be familiar with the narcoleptic puppies video that seems almost ubiquitous in such classes. They are filmed scampering as it is a puppy's wont, and then unsuspectingly they pass out asleep, instantly. Why must we be witnesses to such everyday tragedy? Consuming or punting deceased puppies should be a much more serious crime against nature, yet gets regulated to the most mundane of transgressions. A few particularly noticeable examples of internet exaggeration occurs on the HSQuizbowl message board, these gems are priceless, especially for those that are familiar with the highly insular world that is the College-Level academic competition circuit. "Personally, I'm down with the "CBI apologists = puppy eaters" equivalence..." or this piece of work, "I also dropkick puppies into piles of burning American flags, as one can clearly see by my opposition to dead tossups."

Aquaman and Puppies maliciously maligned...such humiliations must stop!